Hitting My Goal of $5K/Month Felt Anticlimactic

Before you roll your eyes, hear me out

As someone who grew up on a council estate, I know $5K/month is a lot of money.

And trust me, I’ve worked my fair share of sh*tty jobs to know how lucky I am. Cleaning toilets, stocking shelves, serving fish…

You name it; I’ve done it.

Now, thanks to freelance writing, I can do things I’ve always wanted. I can travel the world. I can work from anywhere. I can order food at restaurants without worrying about the bill (most of the time).

So when I say hitting my $5K/month goal felt anticlimactic, I don’t mean this in a negative way.

Not really.

What I mean is the “champagne-popping” moment didn’t happen.

The other night, I watched an episode of Better Call Saul. The lead character, Jimmy, finds out he’s got a big payday coming (over $1 million) after settling a lawsuit.

He rushes to the office to tell his girlfriend Kim, who’s late for a meeting. She congratulates him but has to go.

So Jimmy “celebrates” by drinking shots from a mug with his receptionist. Meanwhile, Kim crashes her car.

That’s how hitting $5K/month earlier this month felt to me.

And it seems I’m not the only one.

“Thank god I didn’t f*ck anyone over for this.”

Good Will Hunting is one of my favourite films. It features stunning performances from Matt Damon and Robin Williams.

Surprisingly, the film was five years in the making. It’s the first film that Matt and Ben Affleck made, and they weren’t sure if it would ever get off the ground.

“It kinda happened in slow motion for us.” — Matt Damon

So imagine their surprise when it won a string of Oscars, including Best Original Screenplay.

Graham Norton asked Matt about that night. How did it feel to win an Oscar aged 27?

(Incidentally, this is how old I am.)

“It took a really long time to just process the thing […]
“I remember very clearly going back with my girlfriend at the time, and we went to her house, and she went to sleep […]
“But I couldn’t sleep […]
“I was sitting there, and I remember very clearly looking at that award and thinking […] ‘Thank god I didn’t f*ck anyone over for this.’
“And I suddenly had this thing wash over me where I thought, ‘Imagine chasing that, and not getting it, and finally getting it in your 80s or 90s with all of life behind you, and realising what an unbelievable waste of your life’ […]
“It can’t fill you up.
“If that’s a hole you have, that won’t fill it […]
“I felt so blessed to have that awareness at 27 […]
“My heart broke for a second as I imagined another one of me — an old man — going, ‘Oh my god, where did my life go? What have I done?’”

“If that’s a hole you have, that won’t fill it.”

So, if hitting goals doesn’t fill you up, what will?

This question is something I’ve been thinking about lately.

And here’s what I’ve realised:

You’ve got to enjoy the process.

This sentence is so cliche that I kinda puked in my mouth just typing it. But cliches stand the test of time.

So how do you “enjoy the process”?

I’ve got five ideas for you.

#1: Only one question matters.

What makes you happy?

My answer is always the same: Writing, morning cuddles, good food, walks in nature, and watching football (aka “boring” small things).

But climbing corporate ladders?

I couldn’t give a f*ck.

“You have to know your preferences well because no matter what you do, someone will tell you you’re wrong.
“If you expect criticism in advance […] you can bash on with a smile, being who you want to be.”
— Derek Sivers

Try to figure out what makes you happy. Notice your feelings. Jot down ideas.

What comes up may surprise you.

#2: Choose better things to give a f*ck about.

I thought money would solve my problems.

But I’ve realised that having more of something doesn’t make your fears disappear — at least not always. On the contrary, having more of something can make them bigger.

You now know the struggle it took to get here and how hard you worked. This awareness means you’ve got something to lose.

And this is why trying to eliminate all the problems in your life is a terrible idea.

Polish writer, Jerzy Gregorek, sums it up best:

“Hard choices, easy life. Easy choices, hard life.”

So, too, does Mark Manson:

“The secret sauce is in the solving of the problems, not in not having problems in the first place […]
“This, in a nutshell, is what ‘self-improvement’ is really about: prioritising better values, choosing better things to give a f*ck about. Because when you give better f*cks, you get better problems.
“And when you get better problems, you get a better life.”

#3: “Without the rain, there would be no rainbow.”

In How to Live, Derek Sivers comes to a “weird” conclusion.

I’ll quickly summarise:

Imagine you’re the conductor of an orchestra, and the instruments are moments in your life. At times, you’ll want the soothing sounds of violins; other times, you need trombones to cut through the noise.

As the conductor, it’s your job to tease out the melodies and find the right balance.

Because balance is what life is all about.

For this reason, pain can be a good thing. It makes you appreciate the good times.

That’s why you want to make “hard choices” for an “easy life”.

“When it rains on your parade, look up rather than down. Without the rain, there would be no rainbow.”
— Gilbert K. Chesterton, English Writer

#4: Build a “Wall of Love”.

My “Wall of Love” is full of screenshots from emails, comments, and messages I’ve received over the last three years.

Now, when I’m feeling low-energy, I open it. Scrolling through the screenshots is like getting a big, warm hug from hundreds of people.

See, you’re not such a bad guy, Scott!

#5: Choose boring.

I used to think people who didn’t travel and stayed at home were boring.

Now, I realise boring is where the gold is.

“How we spend our days is, of course, how we spend our life.”
— Annie Dillard, American author

Takeaways

I’m not sure what you’ll think of this post.

To say that hitting my goal of $5K/month felt anticlimactic is like billionaires who say they’re depressed.

No one wants to hear it.

Shut the f*ck up, Billie. Go cry in your Ferrari.

So even though I’m far from being a billionaire, I wanted to throw this post out. You may experience this post-goal blues at one point in your life (if you haven’t already).

And if you do, here’s a reminder of five things that can help:

#1: Only one question matters — What makes you happy?
#2: Choose better things to give a f*ck about — “Hard choices, easy life. Easy choices, hard life.”
#3: “Without the rain, there would be no rainbow” — A little pain can be a good thing.
#4: Build a “Wall of Love” — And open it up when you’re in a low-energy state.
#5: Choose boring — This is where the gold is.

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